
The following took place between 1pm and 2pm on Sunday 27th December 2009.
You know when life slows down, something is happening, it is happening quickly, but it seems to be going slowly... well that's how it was. Either that or the (now deceased) pheasant
was gliding slowly across the dual-carriageway, and instead of flapping to gain altitude just kept getting lower and lower until it met our windscreen at 70mph - because it looked like that too. Either way it was all over in seconds. Not time enough to change lanes or slow sharply and safely - just WHAM!
Then a spray of fine glass (like 'white' glitter I thought afterwards) dusting front seat passengers, the seats and dashboard. The rear view mirror flying and striking J on the elbow. The sudden loss of visibility, and I am trying to make out a dual-carriageway, at high speed, with surrounding traffic, through the fragments of glass that were still big enough to see through. The shouts of alarm, dismay, from the passengers. I am thinking it's a good job we are in the left hand lane. I am indicating left as I slow the car. Then hazard lights as we pull over on to the verge (the hard shoulder is way too narrow).
Then questions, concern, but I am thinking we need to get out, this is not a safe place to wait in the car. So out we get, we climb the embankment, and wait high above the traffic, in the ice, and wind.
We are cold, but we are alive, and unharmed, and safe.
I phone Dad, and says he will drive out to pick up M and the kids.
I phone the RAC, but the phone cuts out. Signal? Phone probs? I try again, they are in high demand (according to the recorded message) and I am put in a queue. All the time I am wondering if the phone battery or credit will last as long as the queue lasts - 0800 numbers are not free for mobile phones. We wait. I listen to the repeated message and funky music. L is getting cold so M wraps him in her cardy. We wait some more, and pace about at the top of the embankment. Still in the RAC phone queue - surely they will pick up now. But they don't. As we wait we are clearly an object of interest for passing motorists. The oncoming carriageway is full of turning heads. But still no human operator from the RAC.
Then the phone cuts out. What!? Why? Signal? The RAC? I don't know. All I know is that the screen shows my call was over 27 minutes long before it cut out. I still hadn't got through to a human operator. The whole time standing at the top of a freezing embankment by the side of a dual-carriageway. I am cross and frustrated.
Then Dad arrives. M and the kids get inside with some things from the car.
I no longer expect to be able to get through to the RAC, I don't know if I have enough credit or battery to survive another phone queue that might take longer than the fruitless 27 minutes I have already waited. I make a snap decision. I will drive the car back to Dads. M protests, thinks I will not be safe. But I am more concerned about being stopped by a copper, and yet see no other option given the experience so far. This is not weather for waiting around without proper outdoor clothes - you don't mess with hypothermia. I follow behind Dad, we go gently. In hindsight, a tow rope and sign would have made it that little bit less risky, but not much. There is enough screen for me to see through if I sit further forward than normal and we make it back without problems.
The mixtures life throws at us are often interesting. This time a mix of gladness that the people are well and unhurt, annoyance at the lack of RAC, crossness at the 'stupid pheasant', the recall of the impact, the 'if only we went straight on instead of left'. Then acceptance. The things that matter most are still with us. Gratitude that things were not worse. Gratitude for parents that love and care, and go out of their way and the extra mile to help.
2 hours later, and sitting in the warm, I realise that if I had got through to the RAC I would probably only just be getting picked up by an overworked recovery van, and very very cold. Not sure what 2 hours in an icy wind, with only a suit jacket for an overcoat would do to a man - nothing good I am sure. Perhaps it was better the way it turned out.
The car stays at Mum and Dad's that night, and Dad drops us all home.